Disclaimer: These are just some random thoughts on a matter and I may or may not make sense.
Recently the talk of marriage came up with a friend. As one of the discussion points I told her that we don’t need rings/rituals or a paper to tell you that you are married to a person. All you need is a strong bond between the people involved. And that comes from companionship, trust and love (rest can be added later I think, at least these three are more important to me and also I wanted to keep the list small and simple to begin with). The rest of it is just the logisitics. That lead me to the quote I had once posted. Here it is:
You may have heard the word ‘marry’ as a nautical term. It refers to the sailors’ practice of matching two ropes together to give them greater strength as one.
Now having said that I wondered if I told her because that is what she wanted to hear or was it something I believed. After a little more thought on what I did in my life, I realized that I believd what I told her. That is the main reason I didn’t want a grand wedding or anything like that (but still ended up doing it for other’s sake). Registration was required for other logistical purposes by other interested parties. Trust me, if I had had my way with what I believed, I would have saved 5 years of my life. I never believed that my ex-husband’s life was bound to that holy thread. All those years we were involved, I did believe that I was sort of married to him in a way. And to think that an event (called wedding) which was supposed to seal an existing bond (aka marriage) would end up breaking that very bond is a sad thing.
So in a way, I was proven right. But only to myself and I didn’t need any proof for my belief. Sad state of affairs? It is. But that is life and it’s totally fine. I got to grow up as a person a little more after that. That doesn’t mean I am against those rituals or beliefs etc etc. To each their own. But yes, I do still believe that a ring or a holy thread (I am not including that piece of paper because that creates a lot of issues later than anything else) don’t matter in a real sense if the people involved are willing to make their bond work (probably forever. Side note: I love happy endings). And my friend bought that thought too.